Have you ever noticed how some people are always blaming others for their problems and mistakes? Do they really see other people to be responsible or is something else going on? Listen to this short clip by Brene’ Brown for a different perspective.
Sex is Fundamental
Think about this. This makes total sense.
“Sex is Fundamental. It seems to be the area of life that most deeply touches our personal issues. Whatever problems we face in life sooner or later impact our sexuality. If we are chronically angry, the anger will eventually become sexualized. If we cannot tolerate closeness, we will fail at sexual intimacy. If we need to be in control, passion will elude us. If we have experienced trauma, we may repeat it compulsively through how we express our sexuality. If we are perfectionistic, sexual response will elude us. And, if we are so overextended and driven that all of our important relationships are abbreviated, sex will seem brief and overrated.
To put in in another way, we can hide with sex, we can hide from sex, but we cannot be fully ourselves sexually and hide. Our sexual behavior is a core expression of who we are. We do not change fundamental personality traits or beliefs when we become sexual. Issues that we have in general, we will also have sexually. No technique or method will change that.”
Sexual Anorexia — Patrick Carnes
The Life & Rehab of a Sex Addict
Some insight and brutal truth into the life and rehab of a sex addict. Although I feel this article slants to a more dismal description of rehab, the jest is a realistic depiction of the futility of sex addiction. Yes it is true, just as with a chemical addiction, the mind becomes hi-jacked and there is no stopping, each time wanting and needing that bigger and better high. No there is no cure, but yes there is hope. For the addict that truly wants a better life, the addiction can be managed. It is so important to find the right people, people that have devoted significant time and study to the specialty of treating sex addiction. CSAT’s (Certified Sex Addiction Therapists) are recognized as specialists in their field. In the process of recovery the addict will have a new insight and discovery of self as never before. He will learn how to truly experience intimacy, not intensity. You can’t finish, what you never start. A fulfilling, productive life is possible for you and those you love…
http://www.businessinsider.com/this-is-what-it-is-like-to-lose-everything-to-sex-addiction-2014-10
Finding the Silver Lining
When faced with a crisis or adversity, know that you may well find a silver lining from the experience.
Most of the time, the clients I see are in crisis. They are in such emotional pain or chaos that they are seeking help and wanting relief. Sometimes looking back in retrospect, we are fortunate to see that from some of the worst things in life, we experience some of the best things. With maturity and experience we can learn to recognize this when faced with adversity. Know that it is through difficulty, heartache, and sometimes suffering, that we truly grow. We find out so much about ourselves while becoming valuable to others. We develop a new level of empathy and understanding and can help others during their time of need. Although it is almost impossible to welcome hardships, it is unrealistic that you will make it through this life unscathed of such. So, when faced with a crisis or adversity, know that you may well find a silver lining from the experience. Perhaps this awareness will provide the encouragement that allows you to work through the tough times.
